2014 Ladies' Nationals

Once upon a time, in a land not so far, Some ladies embarked on an adventure, by car. Through the wind and the rain, we sped down the road, But alas, they did not tell us the dress code! ‘No hats!' they exclaimed as we walked through the door, And that's when we saw what we didn't before... We were in England now, full of the English you see, They don't like hats, they like crumpets and tea!

But there was an upside to getting out of the car, We talked tactics with tick tocks and boats from the bar. The tick tocks and games took us into the night, And then around about two we saw the daylight! Damn Bristol! They almost had us, they did, Almost got up, went sailing, God forbid. But the English won't get us, 'Not this time!' we said, And then with a blink we went straight back to bed.

When we woke, we worked like an oiled machine, Never has Glasgow ever seemed quite so keen! We had tea in our mouths, on our pillows as well, And then down we went, but.... 'What the hell?!' 'There's no water!' Said Emma 'let's go back to bed' It's a good thing my team's not so easily led. So out sailing we went, in time for gun one, We couldn't let England have all the fun.

In race one and race two we were over the line, Race three and race four we didn't win, but that's fine! By now we had not a bailer in sight, The wind getting stronger, we put up a fight Race five was a race, a good one as well, But race six brought disaster, anyone will tell. Through a crash and a spin, RobWat first to capsize, The boom came down hard, and I heard Emma's cries.

Her hand was not broken, you'll be glad to hear, But Harold came in, reserve stepped into gear! A spare crew with a spare tshirt, luck was on our side, Our rugby success only heightened our pride, We sang through the start, the middle and the end, The LADs in the boat were our new bestest friends! So race seven was a close one, but not the best we could be, And then, for race 8, we bagged our first 123!

After that we paid back Bristol and made them capsize, Then Cambridge were slow, not eating enough pies! So that's three in the bag, and one race to go, But with no bailers, Rob used the only technique she did know, At 40 seconds to go, out the back I fell, Some bad words were said that I can't even spell, But back in the boat and into the race, We still got the one, you should have seen Harold's face!

But we didn't win that one, and then we went in, And, after a share of a shower, we started 'prinkin'', That night was the dinner, the dress casual smeert, The dinner delicious, Lindsay loved the desert! We led the karaoke, got paid for it too, And shot after shot, the English joined our crew. YOLOsquad won and brought home some gifts,

Black sambuca of death caused some memory shifts...

We were definitely at Spoons, with the police no less, But to be honest we as well have played chess. We escaped from the place, there was nothing to see, Made our way home, but took the drinks, they were free! When we got home, only one option was this, Chocolate crispies they wanted? No? Sh*t. By now we were all wide... Wide awake, Turns out so much pro plus can give you the shakes.

We cleaned up the glass, that inevitably broke, Got told of by Bristol, haha! What a joke. We spooned and we slept and woke once again, But we knew we weren't sailing, almost at the end! The prize giving was brief, Birmingham won, Though everyone knows, we had more fun. We sat in McDonald's, unwilling to live, But eventually one more push we did give.

We had a great weekend, we didn't come last, But my, oh my, we were pretty god damn fast! We loved all the socials, on shore and off, And even coming home, we didn't get lost. We made up some songs, I can't remember them all, But sing them really loud and we'll answer your call. Thank you for reading, you made it quite far! I'll stop writing now, see you at the bar.